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Special Purchase!

An Acre of Land in Heaven!

Tabloid King Rupert Murdoch has added "Papal Knight" to his titles, thereby assuring his entry into heaven.  He was given this high holy honor after donating a hefty $10,000,000 to help the church build a new cathedral in a "better" neighborhood.

At the Reality Revival, we offer you an even cheaper way to paradise!  For a mere $100, you will receive an acre of land in heaven, complete with personalized deed, suitable for framing.   This is one one thousandth of one percent of what Murdoch paid.

Is this too good to be true?  Can you really buy land in heaven? Its guaranteed!  All who can prove they have  been to heaven and were unable to claim their land will be given triple their money back!

Hell for the holidays!
IF YOURE GIFT SHOPPING
FOR THE SOLSTICE...

For that friend who has everything and keeps reminding you of it, what could be lovelier than a reservation in Hell?  Only $25, this certificate guarantees your
friend good company and a warm, fun-filled eternity.


Where else but Atheists United can you buy your way into heaven?  Or make reservations in hell?  An offer like this only comes around once!

DON'T MISS THIS ONCE-IN-A-LIFETIME OPPORTUNITY TO OWN A PIECE OF HEAVEN... OR TO SEND A FRIEND TO HELL!

(please provide us with your address or PO Box in heaven and we will overnight the deed to you...)

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